During this time of tribulation he sensed that the same forces that had caused the death of both his predecessors might consume the fledgling Muslim community and cause civil war. So he gave up his right to the caliphate to bring peace. This was already predicted by the Prophet (may Allah bestow peace and blessings upon him) said, “My child is a master. Allah shall reconcile two parties from a great sedition by him.” (Imam Ahmed 5/44), this occurred now.
When he would kill one of those involved in the murder, he would send the proof to the martyrs son. The severed heads of the killers of Al-Hussain (may Allah be pleased with him) were sent to Zayn Al-Abideen (may Allah be pleased with him) and then were placed on poles. Snakes would arrive and prod the heads until eventually entering the head by the nostril. This was a fitting end to those who had committed such a heinous crime as kill a grandson of the Prophet (may Allah bestow peace and blessings upon him).
You have to understand that leaders commit heinous crimes, just to remain in power and this was no different. The Ummayyads saw his claim as invalid and would continue their revenge with curses.
They enacted the final revenge upon the tribe of Ummayyad. They killed every single member of the family of the Ummayyad tribe and the only one to escape was Abdurrahman Al-Dakhil (d.788). He was known to be pious and extremely generous and he was the only person to survive the slaughter. He would flee to Al-Andulus (Spain) and make a new home there.
The Ahl Al-Bayt were persecuted under the Ummayyads and the Abbassids. The change of leadership had not achieved anything.
Re-living trauma is not good for you and not good for children. Explain to them briefly but not in detail. Childhood trauma can lead to greater harm in the future. The Habaib - the Ahl Al-Bayt scholars of Yemen are also not comfortable with people using this issue to illicit emotions and manipulate people. This is done by none more so that the Shia and some Sunni's.
Yet, how sad is that this martyrdom is manipulated in an inappropriate manner that increases grief and sadness. These are not part of the events and neither should they be. His killers were killed and they did not escape punishment nor would they. The main point of this event is that real Sunni's should support Ahl Al-Bayt and when they go against them then they join Yazid's army. There are many adherents to Yazid's army in this time. They go to Muharram gatherings weep during it and attack, slander and oppose Ahl Al-Bayt the very next day. There is no respect for Ahl Al-Bayt left because there is no respect for Muslims left. I am talking about corrupt 'sunni's' here.
The Shia have of course gone to the extreme of bodily harm during the commemoration of this event. One of my friends father once said they should not harm their shoulders and backs; they should slit their throats instead! You see that would be more effective than what they are doing or so he claimed. Even within the Shia they disagree about self harm and of course Sunni Islam totally rejects self harm in any circumstances as unlawful/haram.
Imam Hussain and Imam Hassan (may Allah be pleased with them) never cursed or even slandered those who were responsible for their own fathers martyrdom but those who claim to follow them curse people? Its just another lie, if you love someone then follow them. Their way was truth and justice. Not excess harm towards yourself or others and certainly not cursing others.
We hope that this a balanced re-telling of the events that allows people to look at the entire event in the light of history without being boxed into one part of the story and wondering about its ending.
May Allah bless our master Muhammad, his family, his companions; an endless blessing and endless salutations.